Uh oh~

Feelings - Okay, I am admitting in being bubbly whenever I saw him i.e office or out. It feels strange that I actually feel good whenever he walk past (even though he did not look into my direction) and
I often had the tendency to stare at his back! Damn, I am screwing my feelings right now~

Man - To not be rude, I shall start with a brief introduction of him. Names D, originated from Malacca (just like me) & stayed in Cheng  (I lived there too!!!). He is not very tall, quite fair, average looking with toned body, average sized eyes, and he is a hell of a gentleman! He looks good in both casual & formal wear!!! Sigh~

Attitude - The main attraction I had on him is that he knows how to treat a lady well. It is darn difficult to meet a guy like him here~ Oh goodness, he is a real man, I shall say. He is very sensitive towards his surrounding, knowing what to do or how to act like how a man should be like when there are ladies around.

Bad - However the sad part is that he smokes and enjoyed drinking~ He drinks every single day!!! And I strongly suspected that he is addicted to GYM!!! He goes to gym whenever he has the chance to do so~ Sigh~

Confusion - So how? My friends told me that I am being obvious in liking him already (not towards him but my group of friends BUT I don't felt so at all).Somehow the good part is that he seemed oblivious about this~ LOL~ I will have to buried my head if he knows!

Destiny - I shall let my fate decide my destiny~ Lol~


Love, shall we?
N-geL

Lost

New - It has been months since I last blog and there is a reason for this: job & employment~ After my finals in university, I had been searching high and low for suitable jobs & it takes around a month or more to get myself attached for interviews. I tried applying several companies that I had interest in but there were no responds from any of them. So finally I gave in, applied RWG, and got myself tangled in to the company now.

Adaption - For the first few days reporting to work, I had a very strong desire to tender my resignation letter as the working environment was somewhat terrible. They had a very bad management and system. I was devastated.

Work - The first week was hell for me and the following weeks are somewhat like a survival training. From then on, I kept on polishing my surviving skills, just so I would not feel suffocated. Work was okay, it is just the people that makes it worst~ Hmmm...

People - I had this "boss" where he enjoyed bullying newcomers. To make matter worst, he had this sidekick, a girl, whom is selfish. I do not understand their actions as to why being such an asshole when they can actually be nice. Sigh~ Anyway, this pathetic "boss" resigned (he tender his resignation months back) leaving behind his "beloved" sidekick which I loathed a lot. Overall, the other colleagues are allright.

Myself - However until today, I am having trouble getting through this. I am, seriously, having a hairy eyeball on my friend (who works in other sections) as her section is way better than mine. It is not easy for me to accept my life's changes but I know I had to... Lately I had been picking up bad values, worst practicing it; negativity. I started to obtain bad thinking, feelings, as well as perceptions. I do not want to let my bubbly side glide away as I will lose myself but... it is not easy for me to go all bubbly here~ 

Suffocation - I feel devastated and suffocated. I am not happy here. However I am challenging myself, giving myself another chance to prove that I am capable of doing anything without losing myself. I do not want to back down without trying. It makes no sense to go all down for tiny matters. 

Abracadabra - There, I need miracle~ 

Wrong Tuning~

N-geL